Tuesday, October 19, 2010

The Nicest Compliment

In the last few years my life has drastically changed, within myself: My emotions and concern, things I stand for and believe in, what I think about, the way I treat life and people. I've always been a "late bloomer" and the people I had spent a lot of time with could see that change in me. It resulted in a lot of negativity.

First, I was aggravated a lot and I've taken it out on people without acknowledging it. I believe the aggravation came from  realization about the world. My whole life I lived in bliss and wasn't encouraged to think for myself, or find information. I believed whatever my parents believed, etc. I consider it uneducated, even though I went to school it's not the same. I was too involved in the media, celebrity, childish mind set. I didn't believe in myself, didn't know who I was, but still had (and always will have) the characteristic to care for others. I genuinely want to know about your day when I ask how you are. 

When I think about it more, it's taken three years to go over my past, learn who I am, and love who I'm becoming. It's taken three years to know there isn't an answer for everything and you can't always believe what you read/hear. It's taken three years for me to understand all the issues and "hot-buttons" and taboo in the world. I don't regret this time, and I apologize to those who had to face me on bumpy roads. I'm still discovering and sometimes the aggravation becomes alit, but it is not who I am. 


For so long I have felt haunted by people for things I've said and done, that it ultimately made me feel like a bad person. Three years ago I lived a completely different life so their reactions are understandable, but as sensitive and stubborn as I am it's in my nature to react emotionally instead of rationally. That's something I'm trying to work on, and I suppose we all have something to "work on." But anyway, it made me spend the day wondering what's the nicest compliment I could offer someone because even though to some people, I'm a bad person, or the ones I've hurt along the way see me differently, I still carry the underlining principles I've had since I was a child, even though I fall short at times.

With this all said, in my opinion, the nicest compliment you could give someone is your time. Obviously there are a lot of verbal compliments but I don't think they amount to something you do for someone. You can't get time back. I believe it's the highest compliment you could pay someone, which isn't often appreciated.  

10 comments:

  1. And, with all sincerity, it is my pleasure to take time to come and read your thoughtful posting.
    I appreciate our positive interaction. Please take very good care of yourself and keep smiling
    :-)
    In kindness, Gary.

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  2. Lovely post lettucehead-and as Gary said very thoughtful. I THINK you're a sweet person-I can't imagine anyone thinking you're a bad person :)

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  3. Sam’s right, I can’t imagine anyone thinking you’re a bad person. You’re definitely one of the sweetest people I know! Great post :)
    The enigmatic, masked blogger

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  4. I don't see how you could be a bad person.....

    Anyways, your right. The nicest compliment to give someone is time. Actions speak louder than words.

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  5. Nicely put. And Melissa hit it on the head in saying that actions speak louder than words.

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  6. I completely agree. It's also the thing we tend to be the most selfish with.

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  7. Agree too, I felt different in this post, I felt similar at one thing and another.. I'm to emotional than rational too.. but i just realize that after reading this post..

    sometimes I pay good alibis just to makes my reasons reasonable, but there's only one explanation, I'm emotional.

    I have my principles too in my life, I learned them through childhood, but sometimes I tend to forgot my own principles.

    Yeah, I agree on the time.. being present to one's life and spending some moment with that person.. saying she or he is worth your time..

    i love this post.

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  8. Wonderful post. I do agree, the best compliment you can give someone is your time and your understanding. I think a lot of misunderstandings appear because we're too preoccupied to listen to each other well, because we don't give each other enough time. So, I agree. Wonderful post.

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  9. I have to agree. Genuine, undivided attention time. It's a rarity and it's the one thing that truly matters. I try to remind myself that when I'm pushing my kids aways so I can write. they just wanna be with me.
    Same with old folks. Visit a nursing home and find someone to talk to. They appreciate your time so much. I just wish I had more of it. :(

    Great post!

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  10. The perfect way to say it. Time is something so precious and I don't know that we really think about the effect it has on people when we share it.

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